Unconditional Love

In my mind I’ve been REASONING with the life I was given trying to come up with a logical explanation as to why were we chosen to do this journey. I’ve been trying to find the good in all this but it’s so hard. Nothing makes sense and I know there’s a lesson, a reason and plan behind all this. Will I make myself crazy trying to figure it out or should I just let things play out and accept my destiny. Why do I need to know, why can’t I just live and let? It’s in my nature to solve and I will keep trying.

Trying to solve the great mystery of WHY this happened will probably never become a reality. My heart hurts because somedays I wish it had never happened to us. I get caught up in the idea that the alternative may have been easier, then I snap back into reality and the selfishness of those thoughts. I know I shouldn’t think like that but sometimes the constant demand on me takes it’s toll, then I realize without him it would hard to be me. Together we are the WE and that is what makes me strive to make the best of our time together.

As I struggled to write this today, I guess solving and REASONING with why helps me to make a plan for the future. Makes me want things to be better. Making things better however difficult the road is, is always a better plan than no plan at all. Living this life is what I am supposed to do. My strength is being tested everyday and REASONING with myself has become my greatest challenge.