Unconditional Love

Everyone has a breaking point, today was mine. We are suppose to trust that this is our life path. We are suppose to trust God and all he has planned for us. But each day it gets harder and harder. My life is not what I expected it to be, I’m broken.

I’ve tried to accept this reality, I’ve tried to make the best of things, I’ve tried. As I sit back and see others thriving and living what should be my life, I’m breaking physically, emotionally and mentally. It’s not fair and we don’t deserve any of this. We were robbed of happiness once again and it’s not fair.

The saying the “The Beat is Yet to Come” makes me sick every time I read it, see it or hear it. Whenever we were at our best we got let down with this thing called life. I’ve prayed, ask for forgiveness, tried to figure out what I did wrong to deserve all this. I’ve seen others that are straight up no good, thrive in life and nothing bad ever comes their way. I don’t get it, I never will. It’s breaking me.

Please don’t get me wrong I’m thankful for what I have. I’m thankful for my kids and grandkids. I’m just so angry that what I envisioned my life to be at my age is never going to happen. I envy others who have a life I wanted. why did they get to be so lucky and I have to struggle? Why am I at a breaking point once again?

Life is not fair, I know this for a fact. I just want a break, I just want to be happy, I’m just sick of feeling like this, I’m tried of being broken. This doesn’t feel real anymore and I feel so alone. Hiding pain is the hardest thing I’ve done, but I do it because he needs me to be strong.

How do you stay strong when you’re at your Breaking Point?